If you are experiencing a crisis, call 911, 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or text 'START' to 741741.

So you are considering suicide, committing self-harm or substance abuse. You are either here because we just published the page and you found it on social media, or because we gave it to you directly because we saw you asking how to die by suicide, or telling people that you were going to die by suicide online, were posting about cutting, or drugs or alcohol related to depression or being used in conjunction with a mental illness. If you found it through social media, we would love for you to keep reading because everything that you are going to read below is the truth. Everything that you read below is what I learned after I lost 21 friends and my daughter to suicide.

While writing this, I am trying very hard to cite other articles and link to them. I want you to see that there are many other people that say the things that I am saying. I want you to believe what I am saying. Most of all, if you are young, I want you to know that you cannot solely rely on people your own age when it comes to your problems. You have to turn to people with actual life experience…and that means “years”. Experience in life means time spent figuring out the ways to deal with problems. We urge you to find a therapist if you have problems. My recommendation to you would be a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, or a Psychologist to discuss your problems with. If they see that you need to go a step further and see a Psychiatrist, then take their advice. If you are currently at the point where suicide is something that you are absolutely going to do, then I urge you to do something else instead. Wait 72 hours. Then come back to this page. If you still feel that way in 72 hours, do what the page says at the very top… call 911, or whatever emergency services are in your country. The simplest lesson I can give you is that suicide is not self-help… and if you are at the point of suicide, you are beyond self-help. Reach out for help. If you are considering suicide, but are unsure, then any of the crisis options available at the top of the page will help you.

The simplest way to look at someone considering suicide is that they have problems that seem to persist and never go away. Their problems and the stress from their problems outweigh their ability to cope with their problems. You could also simply say that their pain outweighs their coping mechanisms. Those ways of looking at the situation leave them with the option of looking for a solution. They try and try, and never seem to find one. Often times they are looking for a single solution to multiple issues. Whether caused by psychosis, trauma, mental illness, some other stressor or group of stressors, environmental factors, or social influences they are never able to find a solution. Ultimately, the solution ends up seeming to be suicide.

I am here to absolutely tell you that suicide is not a solution. When you first start going out onto the internet and looking at things regarding suicide, you may see image after image of people holding up signs or looking depressed with tags saying “Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem”. Unfortunately, this is a completely incorrect message. Suicide is not a solution to anything. The only thing that it does do is take whatever problems that a single person has, multiply them by a thousand and magically duplicate them to hundreds of other people in different ways. If I take the lowest number I can find, for every person that succeeds with a suicide attempt at least 20 people will be affected by that suicide. At least six out of those 20 will become suicidal themselves. Does that seem like a good solution to your problems? While you are on that link looking at where I got that tidbit, read that article.

If you are one of those people that believe you are alone with your problems, then I urge you to look at the following website, and specifically the links that I provide to it. The Mighty is a website that tackles serious health conditions by allowing people who face those conditions, and people who work with people facing those conditions to write about them directly to submit material and have it published. It is one of the largest and most successful websites of it’s kind. I am taking you directly to their mental illness and suicide sections below:

https://themighty.com/category/mental-illness/
https://themighty.com/category/mental-illness/suicide/

I have met many suicide attempt survivors since I started By Chaney’s Hands. I have not met one that regretted surviving. All of them have regretted attempting suicide. Just moments ago, I had a friend link this video to me…and I thought I would include it on this page just to drive that message home. Please take a minute to watch this video so that you can see the impact that just attempting suicide can have on others, and the impact it has on the person who made the attempt.

On October 29, 2015 — one month and one week after we lost our daughter to suicide, my wife attempted suicide. To this very day, when I wake up in bed and she is not beside me I have a panic attack. I have dealt with that reality now for over a year. I do not know if it will ever subside, or lessen itself to simple worry. I can tell you that the impact discussed in that video is absolutely real.

I guess all I can say to those of you asking for help with suicide, announcing to others that you are going to die by suicide online, talking about self-harm, showing off your substance abuse habits in videos… it doesn’t matter if it is because of peer influence, or because of depression… I am asking you to evaluate your position and consider the path that you are on. I am asking you to reach out and find healthier ways to deal with things. I am asking you to find a way to actually be unique where everyone in your peer group is acting the same. Be the one to make a difference, and help others. Start that effort by helping yourself.

We can help you with that. Just get in touch with us on our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/ByChaneysHands. Send us a private message. We will get in touch with you as soon as we can. We do not share your information or discussion with anyone. We will find someone local to you that you can contact for help, but you have to be the one to accept responsibility and reach out for help.

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